We were headed up north to the great uncharted territory made famous by Grunge and Grey’s Anatomy. The drive up I-5 was relatively uneventful, which started the idea that
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
In Between the Lines 6
Day Once y doce
Context of previous “Connotate this, bitch!”: As Joe has previously mentioned, many who know him consider him to be...well Joe. So to kind of put in my two cents while he was riding me like a circus pony (no “connotate this, bitch” intended) as I drove around
If you’re like us (which I hope to God you’re not, I wouldn’t wish that on even my worst enemies), you’d probably think there’s nothing at all to do in
-The name of the city was a bastardization of the name of an Indian chief one of the early leaders had befriended.
-The first mayor continually stole from the city. (i.e.- During the day when he was the owner of the saw mill he would sue the city and then in the afternoon when he did mayor stuff he would settle with himself for large sums of money.) P.S.- They re-elected him two more times.
-The initial city was built on mud flaps and had major flooding problems whenever it was high tide.
-They had no sewage system in the beginning so they had a really shitty problem in the streets and it was still a shitty problem even after they got the first Crappers because the sewage pipes led straight to the ocean and whenever the tide came in it would push the shit in the pipes back up them and sometimes launch them out of the toilets like some horrible feces geyser. It got to the point where they started publishing the times of the tide in the paper so people could plans their craps around them. In fact, there was a whole generation of kids who were potty-trained based on the movements of the moon.
-The term “skid row” came from
-After a major fire destroyed most of the downtown area, the city wanted to take the opportunity to raise the streets to combat the tides. It would take 8 to 10 years and the businesses weren’t willing to wait that long to rebuild their building so they went ahead and got to work. The city still went ahead with their plans and so for a couple of years, the streets of
-UPS was started as a drug running company in
-Before Bill Gates donated millions to the school system, the largest contribution for awhile came from Lou Graham. She was the leader of a brothel (or “seamstress circle” as it was known as because that’s the profession the girls checked for the census). There has yet to be a school named after her. Sadness.
I highly recommend this tour to anyone who travels to
You know how when you’re on a road trip and those wonderful green signs zip by on your right indicating how many miles you have to the next city? There’s always that major city on the sign and then all of a sudden all these smaller cities pop up before it on the next sign. I could never live in these “suddenly signed cities” as I’ve come to call them. If they don’t have the common decency to not butt in line on these signs, they’re not a city for me.
My new favorite mountain is
I ripped my jeans right down the ass crack while squatting down to take a picture of the space needle. Consequently when I reached the top, I managed to moon the whole city of
The radio stations in
The Mariners lost by the way.
Coversation excerpt:
Joe: I felt all MacGyver-ish in the bathroom. Because the door latch wouldn’t meet up with its slot so I used a pen to keep the door shut.
Me: Oh I thought you were going to say you used a toothpick as toilet paper.
Joe: What, did I just scrape the shit off?
“Connotate this, bitch!”: “He was riding me like a circus pony.”
In Between the Lines 5
The next morning I was awoken by the sounds of cable cars and buses zipping past the hotel in downtown
Monday, May 21, 2007
In Between the Lines 4
After heading out of
Day Nueve y Diez
Sadly no previous, “Connotate this, bitch!”
Me: So how long do I stay on this road?
Joe: You, uhhh, stay on it until it goes off the map…
Day Ocho
Context of previous “Connotate this, bitch!”: On the first fire pit night, we were running out of wood. So Joe, being the prepared, forward looking individual he is inquired, “Do you think they have this at the grocery store?” To which my friend replied, “Why, do you want to get some wood?”