It truly has been awhile since I’ve written anything and I apologize to anyone out there that was yearning to hear more. Not that there really was anyone, but it’s sort of motivational to think that someone is actually reading. However, this side of the country has left me sort of speechless with its beauty.
I have to say Las Vegas was fun. I went into that city thinking that I would not have any interest in gambling, but left it $70 poorer and quite a bit drunker. I was sort of disappointed in the general lack of nudity throughout the sin city. Apparently, there has been a general effort throughout the city commissioners to divert it to more of a family attraction. I disagree in their logic, not only because I didn’t see any boobs, but also that it’s a bad business proposal. Do you think Disney would make any money if it decided to become a gambling drunkfest? Ok, well, maybe I have always wanted to see Minnie naked….
Honestly, the most amazing thing to me about Las Vegas is how well everything works. Walking throughout the casinos makes it very apparent just how many people are needed to bring the whole thing together. By the way, it is virtually impossible to walk a straight line in Vegas. No, not because you’re always drunk, but because they’ve cleverly designed all the passageways to lead visitors to the casinos and also hid the exit signs. It tricked us, but I do feel we sort of outsmarted the system. We brilliantly scoped out the 1 cent slot machines closest to the cocktail waitress entrance. Scattered throughout the casinos are entrances for the waitresses where they go and retrieve their drinks. So, we would signal a waitress down or wait in the area and then put $1 in the machine and pretend like we were seriously gambling. When, in our minds, we were just there for the top shelf liquor drinks. In reality, however, we ended up getting hooked to the machines and spent quite a bit of time trying to line up the sharks, miners, or magic carpets. We also, by the way, went to Walgreens to get cash back in order to avoid the ridiculous ATM fees at the casinos. There’s a good tip for you.
On the first night, we walked around MGM Grand in search of a cocktail waitress. We tried a few slot machines thinking that these wonderful women would suddenly appear in front of us clamoring for our drink order. However, this proved incorrect, and we were forced to search out the source of the alcohol. After getting a tip from an older woman that was holding a beer, we planned our attack on a cute Asian waitress, Arlene. I asked her if we could get a drink and once she asked us if we were going to gamble we proceeded to plant ourselves in front of the slot machine. However, in the heat of the moment, we accidentally sat in front of a 25 cent machine. These are much too high rolling for us….
After getting our amazing Gin and Tonics and Rum and Cokes, we relocated to the 1 cent machines. Once Arlene realized that we would keep asking for drinks and tipping her, she kept coming back about every 30 minutes. Eventually, she just started bringing the drinks, knowing that we would be empty. After 4 or 5, she started giving us the I-know-you’re-getting-drunk look, but still served us. I even asked her later if she was still going to serve us and she pleasantly responded in a slight accent, “I don wan get you drunk.” Finally, after 8 or 9 drinks, we decided to go in search of food. I will always wonder if Arlene was overcome with sadness when she returned to find us not there in our spots. However, if she did, it was probably because she was realizing she was out another $20 from us. Arlene, I salute you, you were a very good friend for those 6 hours I spent in front of that Shark Frenzy machine. You made losing money all that much easier.
Throughout Nevada I was awestruck with the general friendliness of the locals. Granted, we did spend a great majority of our time in a so-called “Age Restricted” area. A clever euphemism for a retirement community, I might add. We stopped at Walgreen’s to replenish the supply of bottled water and the lady there was amazingly nice. She was almost too nice. I guess I’m just used to the people in Florida.
On the way to Los Angeles, we came to the realization that we did not buy any postcards. So, as we drove along the interstate we scoured various gas stations and convenience stores in search of them. Surprisingly, it’s virtually impossible to find any outside of The Strip. We weren’t about to head back there for fear that we would lose even more money after deciding to just stop in to MGM for a few minutes. On our last stop, one woman overheard me asking about postcards and told me that she makes them and would be more than happy to give me some. All I had to do was just follow her back to her apartment, just a few blocks down the road, for these postcards. Call me skeptical, but I decided it would be best to get back on the interstate. Perhaps my dream of nudity in Las Vegas could have been fulfilled, though.
No comments:
Post a Comment